In the 21st century, the number of single children in families is increasing sharply. It is believed that single children families are on the increase. Far from being regarded as a minority group, a single child has become a norm. Single children have arrived with force.
Increasingly, parents are making a lifestyle choice to stop at one child. The reasons for this trend is attributed to financial pressures. Also, it is easier for parents to devote their meagre time and emotional resources to one child than to many. With both parents devoted to careers physical and emotional resources of parents may be stretched indeed. Whatever the reason, one child families are on the increase.
Parents have to be very cautious that a single child is not lonely or spoilt or socially inadequate so let’s see what our single clubbers really like. The positives include; achievement oriented, confident, articulate, healthy self-esteem and independent. The negative traits could be inflexible, socially inadequate, spoilt, demanding and self-centered.
Single children do not experience fear of dethronement. Their position in the family is assured. Parents and grandparents treat them as ‘super first-borns’. They spend a great deal of their early years in the company of parents who are not distracted by other children and parents devote their considerable time, energy and resources to just one child, which gives them huge academic advantage, as they spend much of their early age in the company of adults. This ultra simulation that they gain in spending most of their time with adults gives a huge boost to their intellectual development.
Conversations often revolve around adult interests and concepts, which can trigger their intellectual development much sooner. Also, their tendency to spend more time alone means they are more likely than others to retreat to their fertile imaginations. They also have advanced verbal skills. On the other hand single children may also be perceived as self-centered as they may have difficulty in sharing, however this totally depends on how they are raised.
If parents place their only child on a pedestal, give into their every whim and limit their opportunity to mix with others the parents are teaching the child to think ‘me’ and not ‘we’. But when parents provide plenty of opportunities for them to play with and spend time with friends from a young age they will invariably learn how to share their time, their space and more importantly their passions with others.
Single children also have a strong desire to please others. They are driven by their parents to achieve and succeed. They would rather please others than gain any innate satisfaction from a job well done. They drive their parents mad with comments such as “how did I do? Did I do well? Do you like what I have done?”
The desire for parental appreciation and approval can make them seem like perfect children. Give a second thought to the second child.